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Camp-Spots- Camping Funnies

Camp-Spots- Camping Funnies

It is always a good time to have a laugh, and what is not better to have a laugh over some of the best the internet has to offer with camping funnies.

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Camper Comments

These are actual comments left on U. S. Forest Service registration sheets and comment cards by backpackers completing wilderness camping trips:

  • “A small deer came into my camp and stole my bag of pickles. Is there a way I can get reimbursed? Please call.”
  • “Escalators would help on steep uphill sections.”
  • “Instead of a permit system or regulations, the Forest Service needs to reduce worldwide population growth to limit the number of visitors to wilderness.”
  • “Trails need to be wider so people can walk while holding hands.”
  • “Ban walking sticks in wilderness. Hikers that use walking sticks are more likely to chase animals.”
  • “All the mile markers are missing this year.”
  • “Found a smoldering cigarette left by a horse.”
  • “Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid building trails that go uphill.”
  • “Too many bugs and leeches and spiders and spider webs. Please spray the wilderness to rid the area of these pests.”
  • “Please pave the trails so they can be plowed of snow in the winter.”
  • “Chair lifts need to be in some places so that we can get to wonderful views without having to hike to them.”
  • “The coyotes made too much noise last night and kept me awake. Please eradicate these annoying animals.”
  • “Reflectors need to be placed on trees every 50 feet so people can hike at night with flashlights.”
  • “Need more signs to keep area pristine.”
  • “A McDonald’s would be nice at the trail head.”
  • “The places where trails do not exist are not well marked.”
  • “Too many rocks in the mountains.”

How could we do this site with out some great camping tips!

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Some Camping Tips

  • When using a public campground, a tuba placed on your picnic table will keep the campsites on either side vacant.
  • Get even with a bear who raided your food bag by kicking his favorite stump apart and eating all the ants.
  • Old socks can be made into high fiber beef jerky by smoking them over an open fire.
  • When smoking a fish, never inhale.
  • A hot rock placed in your sleeping bag will keep your feet warm. A hot enchilada works almost as well, but the cheese sticks between your toes.
  • The best backpacks are named for national parks or mountain ranges. Steer clear of those named for landfills.
  • Acupuncture was invented by a camper who found a porcupine in his sleeping bag.
  • While the Swiss Army Knife has been popular for years, the Swiss Navy Knife has remained largely unheard of. Its single blade functions as a tiny canoe paddle.
  • Effective January 1, 1997, you will actually have to enlist in the Swiss Army to get a Swiss Army Knife.
  • Lint from your navel makes a handy fire starter. Warning: Remove lint from navel before applying the match.
  • You’ll never be lost if you remember that moss always grows on the north side of your compass.
  • You can duplicate the warmth of a down-filled bedroll by climbing into a plastic garbage bag with several geese.
  • When camping, always wear a long-sleeved shirt. It gives you something to wipe your nose on.
  • You can compress the diameter of your rolled up sleeping bag by running over it with your car.
  • Take this simple test to see if you qualify for solo camping. Shine a flashlight into one ear. If the beam shines out the other ear, do not go into the woods alone.
  • A two-man pup tent does not include two men or a pup.
  • A potato baked in the coals for one hour makes an excellent side dish. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck.
  • You can start a fire without matches by eating Mexican food, then breathing on a pile of dry sticks.
  • In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear.
  • The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes excellent kindling.
  • Check the washing instructions before purchasing any apparel to be worn camping. Buy only those that read “Beat on a rock in stream.”
  • The sight of a bald eagle has thrilled campers for generations. The sight of a bald man, however, does absolutely nothing for the eagle.
  • It’s entirely possible to spend your whole vacation on a winding mountain road behind a large motor home.
  • Bear bells provide an element of safety for hikers in grizzly country. The tricky part is getting them on the bears.
  • A great deal of hostility can be released by using newspaper photos of politicians for toilet paper.
  • In an emergency, a drawstring from a parka hood can be used to strangle a snoring tent mate.

Hope you all got a laugh out of them, what is your favorite joke, dose not have to be camping related.

Safe Travels

Dave

 

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